On Free Trade and Positivity

Hey, guys! I thought I'd take a break from writing about writing, and instead blog a little about my own life. So...

Yesterday I went to Seattle with my mother and sister. We grabbed Indian food (my favorite) and visited what may now be my favorite store: One Thousand Villages. It's a free trade store, with handmade products from across the globe.The employees are volunteers. The products are all beautiful and, putting it simply, very, very cool.

These are just a few of the things we bought:

As my family drove home, I thought about writing a bit. I haven't been writing much since NaNoWriMo ended, but I'd like to return to writing regularly this coming year.

I had my birthday recently. One of the gifts, "from" my sister but bought by my mother, is a lovely new journal. I've been wondering what to do with it, and an idea occurred to me: to list the "pros" and "cons" of each day - the events which positively or negatively contributed to that day's experience.

I first tried this exercise on the 21st, the last day of school. This is the (summarized) pro/con sheet which I created:

Pro: quality time with friends, a Secret Santa gift, (successfully) speaking to the school on behalf of Community Service, pleasant conversations with a few teachers, singing with friends onstage during an assembly (fun!), providing much-needed help before school to set up for said assembly 

Con: two minor misunderstandings

It is a truth universally acknowledged that I'm a perfectionist. I focus far too much on my own mistakes, and often unconsciously exaggerate their significance. But when I practiced the good/bad events exercise the other day, I was reminded of how lucky I am, what great friends I have, and how often I'm successful in my endeavors. I think that's what I need, to become truly productive and content in life and my writing - some positivity.

Of course, the 21st was an unusually good day - probably in part because I had no academic worries (hurrah for no homework!) - but I'd still love to continue the exercise in the future. In fact, I'm considering making the pro/con journal a New Year's resolution.

What's your favorite store? Any early resolution ideas? Other thoughts?

I Survived! I Survived!

I survived NaNoWriMo!

It was a struggle, hitting that 50K mark. Others finished with insane word counts - I saw several over 100K. And then, of course, there were plenty who fought valiantly though weren't quite able to reach 50,000.

I did have my doubts throughout the month. Somewhere towards the end of Week 2, I really began to dislike my story. The characters seemed weak, the writing dull. The plot was going nowhere. I was losing faith.

Thankfully, I was able to (mostly) write my way out of the hole, reading over some of what I'd written to regain some confidence. I suffered and prevailed, and I now have a lovely, long, nearly-complete novel to edit. I won't try to work my way through the entire text this month, as some will be doing, but I'll work on it when possible. I'm currently loaded down with tests and applications - and edits to my sister's college apps.
So for right now, I'll be writing and considering ideas, but mostly taking a mini vacation. But before I go, I'd like to share with you the biggest lesson I received from NaNoWriMo: that a writer can't wait for inspiration. There is no such thing as "writer's block" - a completely inability to create new material, often cited as the cause of prolonged, creatively-dry periods.

If you're a writer, you've got to write, to push past tiredness and distraction. You can't wait for the right words. It's true that writers sometimes need breaks. I'm living proof; my break begins as soon as I finish this post. But for much of last year, during the first several months of the 2011-2012 school year, I wasn't producing anything. Not only did I not participate in NaNoWriMo 2011, but I barely wrote a word for weeks. It was the first time such a thing had occurred since I recognized my love for writing towards the end of the fifth grade.

Now, I'm determined to never let it happen again. Whatever career path I eventually choose to undertake, I want to continue writing. I don't care if I ever profit from my work; I write, first and foremost, for myself. Writing is a crucial piece of my identity; it causes me, challenges me, to view the world differently.

As a writer, it's my duty to constantly observe and reflect on the nature of the human condition. The role comes to me naturally; recording my observations, creatively transformed, only follows naturally. Thus, I've come to believe, not writing is denying a part of myself - the creative, expressive piece. Whether through blog post, poem, short story, novel, the medium of expression makes no difference.

Losing Faith

If you're a writer, how many times have you felt that first-draft rush? When you've just begun a new story and the possibilities seem endless? It's a great feeling, isn't it? And it never seems to last long.

The doubts come. Your characters seem flat, stereotypical. Your plot is going nowhere. You don't feel like much of a writer, and your production slows. You run out of inspiration, and you lose faith in your work.

I bring this up because I'm currently dealing with a loss of faith in my NaNoWriMo story. The necessity to produce to reach my daily word count has helped, but I'm still in a rough patch. My plot is dull, as well as my characters. I can't figure out a love interest or the specifics of my protagonist's personality. I can't even decide her age.

Loss of faith can hit us in a number of ways. One is creatively, like with writing. Another one I've witnessed in my sister. She's applying to colleges right now, and some low subject SAT scores have caused her to lose faith in her chances (despite an otherwise glowing application.) Now she's spending time telling herself she can't succeed rather than getting to work: she's lost sight of the goal.

So what to do when we've lost in faith in our work? Even in ourselves?

I've always found this one a difficult question to answer. When it comes to writing, I usually try to take a break from a piece, for a new perspective, which isn't much of an option here. So instead, I'm trying to remember what inspired me in the first place (as discussed in this post.) But I'm also trying to simply power through - to accept that not all of my ideas are very good, but still work with them. I have to tell myself that these words aren't wasted, but that they're helping me to craft a vision for this story. And generally, when one steps back from a story after some time, those words which seemed weak and unoriginal aren't nearly as poor as they felt during the writing process.

I guess my message is that it’s necessary for a writer to believe in herself, or if not, then to still power through, and believe that eventually she can eventually reach the level of quality she’s striving for.

How do you power through a project or rough patch despite a loss of faith?

Working with Deadlines

As you probably know, this month is NaNoWriMo - National Novel Writing Month, for those of you who don't know. Every year, hundreds of thousands of insane, sleep-deprived writers (myself included) attempt to write a 50,000-word draft in just the month of November.

A very good question which might've just popped into your head is:Why? Why would someone write so much so quickly? Why put so much stress on yourself?

My answer is one which I'm sure a lot of WriMos share: NaNo is fun, sure, but I need to work with a deadline.

I'm a procrastinator by nature. I love to invent stories, but writing can be a tough task when I'm struggling with translating my ideas into words. So, when I'm drafting, I need to be able to really chart my progress - and to set strict goals for myself. Otherwise, I'll never get a job done fully, because I won't devote the necessary time and energy to the task. As fun as writing can be, I always find myself needing that extra push.

I love NaNo because it perfectly meets my needs. First, it forces me to write those 50,000 words - otherwise, I don't win the challenge. (Winning is a big incentive for me.) It lets a writer check her daily progress, too, on a line graph, and has forums so writers can give and gain advice on plots, character names, and more. Plus, each writer can select his or her region, and meet up with other WriMos in the area.

Do you find it necessary to work with deadlines? Ever tried NaNoWrimo, or want to in the future?